9 Ways to regulate your Emotions!
That feeling of dreading the day before it starts or as soon as it starts , anger , frustration,
Feelings of leaving everything and just going away to a new beautiful land seems just about the best idea ever.
Essentially it's just us trying to run away from our problems and feelings but doesn't that sound lovely?
What do I do, how to do I stop feeling this way, is the most dreaded question.
We know what to do ,most of the times the answer is right infront of us. But it's our inability to do anything about it that makes it hard, and it's alright, it's perfectly fine to feel that way.
How to deal with sadness? Upsetting situations , aggravated feelings?
1) Acceptance:
It's okay for me to feel this , I don't have to feel guilty about my beautiful ability to feel emotions. It just shows I'm human and I'm having a human emotional situation. Accept that sometimes it's okay to be wrong, maybe you're having a hard time accepting that you have to let go of something, a habit, a compulsion, a person.
Give it some time , understand and agree that maybe it's just time and patience that's needed.
2) Go find a place of solitude :
No it's not lonliness , it's us finding that solitude, that space to just be, literally just BE. Exist in that space . Exist like it's nobody's business. Learn how to set boundaries, say no, take all the time you need , because at the end of the day, what's important is our mind, our soul that needs to feel content, at bliss. So take care of yourself in solitude.
3) Relax your body :
Try and release that stored up tension in your body , in your mind , in your face , in your shoulders, that burrowing of brows, that squinting of eyes . Relax that jaw.
According to psychology, a proven way to relax all your muscles is a technique called Jacbonson's Relaxation technique, it focuses on tightening and relaxing each muscle group individually.
I suggest that you find a safe space, lie on your bed , get comfortable and start from the down,
your feet , clench them build up the tension for 5sec and then release
Focus on your legs and glutes , tighten them and then release after 5 sec
Similarly focus on your abdomen, chest, arms ,face , every part of your body.
Then go into relax mode , stay in the state till you feel comfortable.
4)BREATHE:
Whenever you're aggravated, your breath changes , when you're happy your breath is different, it's different when you're sad, anxious, excited. Every emotional response has a difference in the breathing patterns.
Author of the book "Think like a monk" Jay Shetty explains how ,when we change our breath ,we can change our emotional reaction.
When we concentrate on the way we breath, be intentional about every breath. It can calm us down, change our emotions. It can be hard to think hey I'm so annoyed but let's go breathe? But just starting with few deep breaths, you can see a change!
5) TALK TO A TRUSTEE:
A third person's view is always not the best, but talking it out to someone whom you trust will give you a a rational solution, rather than just fake it for your sakes. A different perspective helps assess the situation or just venting it out automatically clears the muddy water and makes you see the situation better.
It could be your spiritual mentor or your therapist who'd probably be more rational and unbiased but if you don't have them then talk to a friend, you know wouldn't sugarcoat things or suggest wrong solutions.
6) Be intentional :
You can't just get out of bad space instantly, it requires time , pateince and actually steps that needs to taken. Take the the action to intentionally make yourself feel better.
I feel much better around water, water bodies of any sort immediately calms me down but it's not always we can have access to such a place, so? Bath tubs? Shower. Just hop into a cold shower, shut your eyes , feel the water on your body, Visualize the anxiety leave your body .
7)SMILE:
Is forcing a smile healthy? Studies show just the action of smiling, even if it's not what you're emotions are currently at, will help you feel better. Smile at a mirror, look at your self smiling, yes it's okay if you feel like a lunatic. It works , be a lunatic and smile on your own , or smile at a stranger, or anyone else ,just to be friendly .
Soon our mood changes , we start to feel a little bit better, that enhances our capability to see a situation from above our previous emotional barrier.
8)Get Busy!:
Do what you need to get done
Start with a 5 min rule
Go do a work for just 5 mins, it's the start , the initiation that takes you a step further than the rabbit hole that you're drowning in.
Do something that has to be done asap, start
The rule suggests that no matter how much you wanna suck down and the intensity of unwillingness is present, once you start, whether is 5mims of work, 5 mins of workout, 1 paragraph of a book, psychological we tend to do a little bit more, now that we've started. It might even start getting Interesting, exciting, you never know. Soon our mind is a little bit distracted if not totally and the issue at hand seems a bit easier.
9) Work on your expectations and empathy :
Oftentimes we are anxious or angry or upset and aggravated because our expectations of something were not met . Maybe it was a person or a situation or you felt like you let yourself down, it could be anything but the root cause most often is the expectation or the outcome that we look for doesn't come across how we thought it would makes us mad.
I'm glad that happens because that means you have expectations, you're lucky enough to have people that you think can meet your standards or that You have standards high enough, it's not a low bar. So congratulations! But here's what's next
Empathy, show empathy towards the person you're angry at , or the situation. Understand what part was the issue, Question yourself:
🌸Am I being rational?
🌸Is this coming from a secure space?
🌸Is this serving me?
🌸Am I just emotional due to burnout?
🌸Is it sensory overload?
🌸Am I overwhelmed by everything around me and I'm not actually mad at this particular thing?
As you self questions. Wait. See what comes up.
Then find solutions.
If the other person was the issue, how did they not meet your expectations? Was it deliberate? Or was it improbable.
Find empathy for yourself,for others.
Give yourself some time .
Good things are coming to you. Believe in that , believe that you're situation will get better regardless of how high your emotions are running right now, no matter what the situation is, it will get better. These are just some steps to make sure you have a easier way to get through it.
My Current Read is really helping me with this, You can definitely check it out!
His previous book , definitely played a hand in picking up the new one.
Candles! Because I love candles and everything becomes a vibe with it!
Thanks for reading guys.❤️
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